David A. Carbonell – The Worry Trick: Book Review & Audio Summary

Book Info

• Book name: The Worry Trick: How Your Brain Tricks You into Expecting the Worst and What You Can Do About It
• Author: David A. Carbonell
• Genre: Self-Help & Personal Development
• Pages: 272
• Published Year: 2016
• Publisher: New Harbinger Publications
• Language: English

Audio Summary

Synopsis

In The Worry Trick, clinical psychologist David A. Carbonell reveals the counterintuitive truth about chronic worry: the harder you fight it, the stronger it becomes. Drawing on decades of experience treating anxiety disorders, Carbonell exposes the deceptive mechanism behind excessive worry—how our brains misinterpret doubt as danger, triggering responses that actually intensify our anxiety. Rather than offering yet another set of techniques to “stop worrying,” this groundbreaking book teaches readers to fundamentally change their relationship with worry itself. Through accessible explanations and practical strategies rooted in cognitive-behavioral therapy, Carbonell provides a roadmap for breaking free from the exhausting cycle of chronic worry and reclaiming peace of mind.

Key Takeaways

• Worry tricks your brain by making you interpret doubt as immediate danger, triggering counterproductive responses that amplify anxiety
• Fighting worry through reasoning, distraction, or avoidance actually reinforces it—the key is changing your relationship with worry, not eliminating it
• Chronic worry thrives on your attempts to control it; accepting uncertainty and allowing worries to exist without engaging them breaks the cycle
• Understanding the mechanics of the “worry trick” empowers you to recognize when anxiety is playing games with your mind
• Practical strategies based on acceptance and exposure can help you develop a healthier, more workable relationship with everyday worry

My Summary

When Worry Becomes the Problem, Not the Solution

I’ll be honest—when I first picked up The Worry Trick, I was skeptical. As someone who’s read countless self-help books promising to “cure” anxiety, I expected another rehash of “just think positive” advice. But David A. Carbonell, a clinical psychologist with decades of experience treating anxiety disorders, takes a refreshingly different approach. He doesn’t promise to eliminate worry from your life. Instead, he exposes the sneaky psychological trap that transforms normal, occasional worry into chronic, debilitating anxiety.

The book’s central insight hit me like a revelation: worry isn’t just an annoying mental habit—it’s an active trick your brain plays on you. And like any good magic trick, once you understand how it works, it loses its power over you.

Carbonell opens with a scenario that will feel painfully familiar to anyone who struggles with chronic worry. You’re going about your day when an intrusive thought appears: “What if that report isn’t good enough?” Within seconds, your mind spirals through a catastrophic chain reaction: losing your job, financial ruin, inability to pay bills. What started as a minor doubt about a work project has somehow escalated into imagining yourself homeless—all in the span of thirty seconds.

This isn’t irrational thinking, Carbonell argues. It’s your brain doing exactly what evolution designed it to do: identify potential threats and motivate you to address them. The problem is that this ancient survival mechanism hasn’t adapted well to modern life, where most of our “threats” are hypothetical futures rather than immediate physical dangers.

The Anatomy of the Worry Trick

So what exactly is this “worry trick” Carbonell keeps referring to? It’s deceptively simple, which is precisely what makes it so powerful.

Here’s how it works: Your brain experiences doubt about the future—a perfectly normal human experience. But instead of recognizing this doubt as mere uncertainty (which it is), your brain misinterprets it as danger. This misinterpretation triggers your fight-or-flight response, flooding your body with stress hormones and creating an urgent feeling that you must do something right now to address this “threat.”

What do most people do when they feel threatened? They try to eliminate the threat. With worry, this means attempting to stop the worrying thought, prove it won’t happen, or prepare for every possible negative outcome. These responses seem logical in the moment, but they’re actually the gasoline that fuels the worry fire.

Carbonell uses the perfect analogy: it’s like arguing with yourself. When you argue with your own worries, trying to reason them away or prove they’re irrational, you can never win. Why? Because worry deals in possibilities, not probabilities. You can’t prove something won’t happen in the future. The very act of trying to prove a worry wrong validates its importance in your mind.

I found this explanation incredibly validating. For years, I’d felt frustrated with myself for not being able to “logic” my way out of anxious thoughts. Turns out, that approach was doomed from the start—not because I wasn’t smart enough, but because I was playing a rigged game.

Why Your Natural Responses Make Everything Worse

Carbonell dedicates significant space to explaining why our instinctive responses to worry are counterproductive. This section was eye-opening for me because it reframed behaviors I’d always seen as “coping strategies” as actually being part of the problem.

Take distraction, for instance. When a worrying thought appears, many people try to think about something else. Watch TV, scroll through social media, throw themselves into work—anything to avoid the uncomfortable feeling of anxiety. But as Carbonell points out, this is like being told not to think about a white elephant. The moment someone says it, that’s all you can think about. Suppressing thoughts requires you to monitor for those thoughts, which means you’re actually keeping them active in your mind.

Reassurance-seeking is another common response that backfires. You might repeatedly ask your partner, “You still love me, right?” or constantly check your bank balance to make sure you’re not broke. Each time you seek reassurance, you get temporary relief—but you’re also teaching your brain that the worry was legitimate and dangerous, requiring immediate action. Over time, you need more and more reassurance to feel okay, and the anxiety strengthens.

Perhaps most insidious is what Carbonell calls “worry about worry.” This is when you become anxious about how much you’re worrying. You think, “I shouldn’t be this anxious,” or “What’s wrong with me that I can’t stop worrying?” This meta-worry creates a second layer of anxiety on top of the original worry, effectively doubling your distress.

Reading this section, I felt like Carbonell was describing my exact thought patterns. The relief of having these experiences named and explained was immense. I wasn’t broken or weak—I was just stuck in a very common psychological trap.

Changing Your Relationship With Worry

If fighting worry makes it worse, what’s the alternative? This is where Carbonell’s approach diverges from traditional anxiety advice, and where the book becomes truly valuable.

Instead of trying to eliminate worry or control your thoughts, Carbonell advocates for changing your relationship with worry itself. Think of worry not as an enemy to be defeated, but as an annoying neighbor who occasionally knocks on your door. You don’t have to invite them in for coffee, but you also don’t need to barricade your house or move to a different state to avoid them.

This concept draws heavily from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), a branch of cognitive-behavioral therapy that emphasizes accepting difficult thoughts and feelings rather than fighting them. The goal isn’t to feel good all the time—it’s to live a meaningful life even when uncomfortable thoughts and feelings are present.

Carbonell explains that chronic worry thrives on two things: your belief that the worry is important and dangerous, and your attempts to control or eliminate it. When you change your relationship with worry, you undermine both of these factors. You acknowledge the worry’s presence without treating it as an emergency, and you allow it to exist without trying to make it go away.

This might sound passive or defeatist at first. I certainly thought so. Isn’t accepting worry just… giving up? But Carbonell clarifies that acceptance isn’t resignation. It’s the opposite of struggle. When you stop struggling against worry, you free up enormous amounts of mental and emotional energy that you can redirect toward things that actually matter to you.

Practical Strategies for Breaking the Cycle

The book isn’t just theory—Carbonell provides concrete techniques for implementing this new approach. One of the most powerful is what he calls “exposure to uncertainty.” Instead of seeking certainty and reassurance, you practice sitting with the discomfort of not knowing.

For example, if you worry about your health, instead of Googling symptoms for the hundredth time, you might say to yourself, “I notice I’m having the thought that something might be wrong with my health. That’s possible. I can’t know for certain right now.” Then you go about your day without seeking reassurance or trying to eliminate the thought.

This felt terrifying when I first tried it. Every fiber of my being wanted to check, research, or seek reassurance. But Carbonell explains that this discomfort is temporary. Your anxiety will spike initially, but if you don’t feed it with reassurance-seeking behaviors, it will naturally decrease on its own. You’re essentially teaching your brain that uncertainty isn’t dangerous—it’s just uncomfortable.

Another technique Carbonell discusses is “postponing worry.” When a worry pops up at an inconvenient time, instead of either engaging with it or trying to suppress it, you acknowledge it and schedule a specific time later to think about it. Most people find that when “worry time” arrives, the concern has either resolved itself or no longer feels urgent.

Carbonell also emphasizes the importance of recognizing worry’s “false alarms.” Chronic worriers have overactive alarm systems that go off constantly. By tracking your worries and noting how many actually come true, you can start to see the pattern: your brain is crying wolf most of the time. This doesn’t mean you ignore all concerns, but you learn to recognize the difference between productive problem-solving and unproductive worry loops.

Why This Approach Works in Modern Life

One aspect I particularly appreciated about The Worry Trick is how relevant it is to contemporary life. Carbonell wrote this book in 2016, but the strategies feel even more applicable today, in our age of constant information overload and unprecedented uncertainty.

Think about how modern life feeds the worry trick. We have 24/7 news cycles highlighting every possible danger. Social media allows us to compare ourselves to others constantly. We can Google any symptom and convince ourselves we have a terminal illness. We’re expected to plan for retirement, climate change, and our children’s college funds while also living in the moment and practicing self-care. The opportunities for worry are endless.

Carbonell’s approach is particularly suited to this environment because it doesn’t require you to change your circumstances or eliminate sources of stress. You don’t need to quit social media, stop watching the news, or move to a cabin in the woods (though you certainly can if you want to). Instead, you learn to navigate uncertainty and discomfort without letting worry hijack your life.

This is crucial because uncertainty isn’t going away. In fact, the pace of change in our world means we’re dealing with more uncertainty than ever before. A strategy that depends on achieving certainty and control is doomed to fail. But a strategy that helps you function effectively despite uncertainty? That’s genuinely useful.

Applying These Insights to Daily Life

Reading about these concepts is one thing; applying them is another. I’ve been practicing Carbonell’s approach for several months now, and I can share some real-world applications that have made a difference.

At work: When I notice myself spiraling about a project or presentation, instead of spending hours trying to make it “perfect” (which is really just worry in disguise), I acknowledge the uncertainty: “This might not go perfectly, and I can’t control how people will react.” Then I do my reasonable best and move on. The quality of my work hasn’t suffered—in fact, I’m more productive because I’m not stuck in paralysis.

In relationships: Rather than seeking constant reassurance from my partner about our relationship, I practice sitting with the inherent uncertainty of any human connection. No one can guarantee the future, and that’s okay. This has actually strengthened our relationship because I’m not exhausting them with constant reassurance-seeking.

With health concerns: This is a big one for me. I used to Google every minor symptom, which inevitably led to hours of worry. Now, when I notice a symptom, I assess whether it requires medical attention. If not, I acknowledge the worry without feeding it: “I notice I’m worried about this. I can’t know for certain what it means right now.” The worry still appears, but it doesn’t control my behavior.

Regarding finances: Money worries can be particularly sticky because financial planning is actually important. The key I’ve learned is distinguishing between productive planning and worry loops. I can check my budget and make reasonable plans without checking my bank balance ten times a day or catastrophizing about hypothetical financial disasters.

With parenting: If you want a masterclass in uncertainty and lack of control, try raising children. Carbonell’s approach has been invaluable here. I can’t protect my kids from every possible harm, and trying to do so would actually harm them by preventing them from developing resilience. Instead, I take reasonable precautions and accept that I can’t control outcomes.

What This Book Does Well (And Where It Falls Short)

Having spent considerable time with The Worry Trick, I can identify both its strengths and limitations. On the positive side, Carbonell’s writing is remarkably accessible. He avoids jargon without dumbing down the concepts, and he uses helpful analogies and examples throughout. The book never feels preachy or condescending—Carbonell writes with the compassion of someone who genuinely understands the struggle of chronic worry.

The framework itself is also incredibly useful. Understanding the mechanics of the worry trick has genuinely changed how I relate to my own anxious thoughts. There’s something powerful about having a clear explanation for why your brain does what it does. It removes the layer of shame and self-judgment that often accompanies anxiety.

The practical exercises are another strength. Carbonell doesn’t just explain concepts—he provides specific techniques you can implement immediately. The book includes worksheets and step-by-step instructions for various exposure exercises and cognitive strategies.

However, the book does have some limitations. For one, readers expecting a quick fix will be disappointed. Changing your relationship with worry is a process that requires consistent practice over time. Carbonell is upfront about this, but it’s worth noting that this isn’t a “read it once and you’re cured” kind of book.

Additionally, while Carbonell draws from various therapeutic approaches, the book is primarily grounded in cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT). These are evidence-based approaches, but they’re not the only ways to address anxiety. Readers looking for a more holistic approach that incorporates nutrition, exercise, meditation, or other lifestyle factors might find the book somewhat narrow in scope.

The book also focuses primarily on worry rather than other anxiety presentations like panic attacks, social anxiety, or obsessive-compulsive disorder. While the principles can apply to these conditions, readers dealing with specific anxiety disorders might benefit from additional resources tailored to their particular challenges.

Finally, some readers have noted that the book doesn’t break dramatically new ground. The concepts Carbonell presents are well-established in the anxiety treatment literature. If you’re already familiar with CBT and ACT principles, you might not find much here that’s revolutionary. However, Carbonell’s particular framing of the “worry trick” and his clear explanations make these concepts more accessible than many academic or clinical texts.

How This Book Compares to Other Anxiety Resources

The anxiety self-help genre is crowded, so it’s worth considering how The Worry Trick stacks up against other popular books in this space.

Compared to Claire Weekes’s classic “Hope and Help for Your Nerves,” Carbonell’s book is more structured and technique-focused, while Weekes takes a more reassuring, conversational approach. Both emphasize acceptance rather than fighting anxiety, but Carbonell provides more specific strategies for implementation.

David Burns’s “When Panic Attacks” offers a broader range of cognitive and behavioral techniques, including many that Carbonell would classify as “fighting” worry. Burns’s approach is more comprehensive but potentially more overwhelming for readers who just want to understand the core dynamic of chronic worry.

Russ Harris’s “The Happiness Trap,” which focuses on ACT principles, covers similar ground to Carbonell’s book but applies the concepts more broadly to life satisfaction rather than specifically to worry. Readers interested in the acceptance-based approach might want to read both books for different perspectives.

Edmund Bourne’s “The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook” is more comprehensive and clinical, covering various anxiety disorders and a wide range of treatment approaches. It’s an excellent resource but can feel overwhelming. The Worry Trick is more focused and accessible for readers specifically struggling with chronic worry.

What sets Carbonell’s book apart is its laser focus on the specific mechanism of chronic worry—the trick itself. Rather than trying to be a comprehensive anxiety resource, it does one thing very well: it explains why worry persists and how to change your relationship with it.

Questions Worth Pondering

As I’ve worked with the concepts in this book, several questions have emerged that I think are worth reflecting on, both personally and in conversation with others who struggle with worry.

First: What function does worry serve in your life beyond the obvious? I’ve noticed that sometimes my worry feels like productivity or preparation. If I’m worrying about something, I feel like I’m doing something about it, even when I’m not. Recognizing this has helped me see when worry is masquerading as problem-solving.

Second: How would your life be different if you accepted that you can’t control outcomes? This isn’t a rhetorical question—it’s worth seriously considering. What would you do differently if you truly accepted that uncertainty is unavoidable? Would you take more risks? Spend less time planning and more time living? This question has been transformative for me.

Final Thoughts: A Book That Respects Your Intelligence

What I appreciate most about The Worry Trick is that it respects readers’ intelligence and lived experience. Carbonell doesn’t pretend that anxiety is simple or that changing your relationship with worry is easy. He acknowledges that chronic worry is genuinely distressing and that the strategies he presents require courage and practice.

This book won’t cure your anxiety—and Carbonell never claims it will. What it will do is give you a framework for understanding why your worry persists despite your best efforts to control it, and it will offer you a different path forward. Not an easier path necessarily, but one that actually leads somewhere other than more worry.

If you’re tired of fighting with your own mind, if you’ve tried reasoning with your worries and found it exhausting and ineffective, if you’re ready to try a fundamentally different approach—this book is worth your time. It certainly has been worth mine.

I’d love to hear from others who’ve read The Worry Trick or who are working on changing their relationship with worry. What strategies have you found helpful? What aspects of chronic worry do you still struggle with? Drop a comment below and let’s continue this conversation. After all, one of the best antidotes to worry is connection with others who understand the struggle.