Urban Tantra: Revolutionizing Sacred Sex for the Modern Age
Book Info
- Book name: Urban Tantra: Sacred Sex for the Twenty-First Century
- Author: Barbara Carrellas
- Genre: Self-Help & Personal Development, Social Sciences & Humanities
- Published Year: 2007
- Publisher: Ten Speed Press
- Language: English
Audio Summary
Please wait while we verify your browser...
Synopsis
In “Urban Tantra,” Barbara Carrellas reimagines ancient Tantric practices for the modern world. This groundbreaking guide offers a fresh, inclusive approach to sacred sexuality, blending traditional wisdom with contemporary insights. Carrellas provides practical exercises, meditations, and rituals to help readers explore their sensuality, deepen intimate connections, and achieve spiritual growth through conscious sexuality. The book challenges conventional notions of sex and orgasm, encouraging readers to expand their understanding of pleasure and intimacy in everyday life.
Key Takeaways
- Tantra can be practiced by anyone, anywhere, regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity
- Mindfulness and breath work are essential components of Tantric practice
- Expanding the definition of orgasm can lead to more fulfilling sexual experiences
- Preparation and intention-setting are crucial for creating sacred sexual spaces
- BDSM and other alternative sexual practices can be incorporated into Tantric rituals
My Summary
Embracing Urban Tantra: A Journey of Sexual and Spiritual Awakening
As I delved into Barbara Carrellas’s “Urban Tantra: Sacred Sex for the Twenty-First Century,” I found myself on an unexpected journey of self-discovery and sexual enlightenment. This isn’t your typical self-help book about improving your sex life; it’s a comprehensive guide to reimagining your entire relationship with sexuality, spirituality, and personal growth.
Demystifying Tantra for Modern Times
One of the most striking aspects of Carrellas’s approach is how she strips away the mystique and exoticism often associated with Tantra. Instead of presenting it as an ancient, esoteric practice reserved for spiritual gurus, she brings it down to earth and makes it accessible to everyone. As someone who’s always been curious about Tantra but intimidated by its perceived complexity, I found this approach refreshing and inviting.
Carrellas emphasizes that Urban Tantra can be practiced anywhere, by anyone. This inclusivity is a breath of fresh air in a field that has often been dominated by heteronormative, white perspectives. She explicitly welcomes practitioners of all genders, sexual orientations, and relationship styles, which resonated deeply with me as a proponent of diversity and inclusivity in all aspects of life.
The Power of Presence: Mindfulness in Sexuality
At the core of Carrellas’s teachings is the importance of presence and mindfulness in sexual experiences. She argues convincingly that our greatest sexual organ is our mind, and that by learning to be fully present in our bodies, we can unlock new realms of pleasure and connection.
The book offers a variety of practical exercises to help readers cultivate this presence. From breathing techniques to active meditations, these tools are designed to help us drop into our bodies and become more attuned to our sensations. As someone who often finds my mind wandering during intimate moments, I found these exercises to be invaluable. They’ve not only enhanced my sexual experiences but have also spilled over into other areas of my life, helping me to be more present and mindful in my daily activities.
Redefining Orgasm: Beyond the Genital Climax
One of the most paradigm-shifting aspects of “Urban Tantra” is its expanded definition of orgasm. Carrellas challenges the conventional understanding of orgasm as a brief, genital-focused event and instead presents it as a wide spectrum of experiences. She introduces concepts like “energy-gasms,” “breath-gasms,” and even “cry-gasms,” arguing that any intense release of energy can be orgasmic.
This redefinition was initially challenging for me to grasp, but as I experimented with the techniques in the book, I began to understand. I realized how limited my understanding of pleasure had been and how much potential for ecstasy exists beyond traditional sexual acts. This expanded view of orgasm has not only enriched my sexual experiences but has also helped me find more joy and release in everyday life.
The Art of Sacred Space: Preparation and Intention
Carrellas places great emphasis on the importance of preparation and intention-setting in Tantric practice. She likens it to preparing for a theatrical performance, where setting the stage and getting into character are crucial for a successful show. This resonated with my own experiences of how the environment and mindset can dramatically affect the quality of intimate encounters.
The book offers practical advice on creating sacred spaces for Tantric rituals, from decluttering and decorating to choosing music and props. What I found particularly valuable was the emphasis on transitioning from everyday life into a ritual space. Carrellas suggests practices like taking a cleansing bath or screaming into a pillow to release the day’s stresses before entering into Tantric practice. These ideas have helped me create more intentional and meaningful sexual experiences, even when time is limited.
Expanding Boundaries: BDSM and Alternative Practices in Tantra
One of the most surprising and thought-provoking sections of the book for me was Carrellas’s discussion of how BDSM and other alternative sexual practices can be incorporated into Tantric rituals. As someone who had previously seen Tantra as all about gentle, loving touch, this was initially jarring. However, Carrellas makes a compelling case for how practices involving power exchange and intense sensation can actually enhance mindfulness and presence.
She argues that both Tantra and BDSM are centered around consciousness and consent, making them natural allies. This section challenged my preconceptions and opened my mind to new possibilities for exploring power dynamics and intense sensations within a spiritual framework.
The Challenges of Urban Tantra
While I found “Urban Tantra” to be an invaluable resource, it’s not without its challenges. The sheer amount of information presented can be overwhelming at times. I often felt the need to reread sections or take breaks to fully process the concepts. Additionally, some of the practices require a significant time commitment, which can be difficult to manage in our busy modern lives.
However, Carrellas anticipates these challenges and offers practical advice for incorporating Tantric practices into everyday life. Her concept of the “conscious quickie” – a short, focused Tantric practice that can be done in as little as 20 minutes – is particularly useful for those of us with hectic schedules.
Personal Reflections and Applications
As I’ve worked my way through “Urban Tantra,” I’ve found myself applying its principles not just to my sex life, but to many aspects of my daily existence. The emphasis on presence and mindfulness has helped me be more focused and engaged in my work. The expanded definition of pleasure has allowed me to find more joy in simple sensory experiences, from the taste of a good meal to the feel of warm sunshine on my skin.
In my relationships, both sexual and platonic, I’ve noticed a greater depth of connection as I’ve practiced being more present and attuned to others. The book’s teachings on communication and consent have improved my ability to express my needs and boundaries clearly, leading to more fulfilling interactions.
A Call to Sexual and Spiritual Exploration
As I reflect on my journey through “Urban Tantra,” I’m struck by how much it has expanded my understanding of sexuality, spirituality, and the connection between the two. Carrellas’s work challenges us to view sex not just as a physical act, but as a potential pathway to personal growth, healing, and spiritual connection.
While the practices and concepts in the book may not resonate with everyone, I believe there’s value in its core message: that by approaching our sexuality with mindfulness, intention, and an open mind, we can unlock new realms of pleasure, connection, and self-understanding.
As we navigate the complexities of sexuality in the 21st century, “Urban Tantra” offers a roadmap for creating more conscious, fulfilling, and spiritually aligned sexual experiences. It invites us to expand our definitions of sex, pleasure, and intimacy, and to approach our sexual selves with curiosity, compassion, and a sense of adventure.
In closing, I’d like to pose a question to you, dear reader: How might your life change if you approached your sexuality as a sacred, spiritual practice? What new possibilities might open up for you? I encourage you to explore these questions, whether through the practices in “Urban Tantra” or through your own path of sexual and spiritual discovery. The journey may be challenging at times, but the potential for growth and transformation is immense.
